Ugh. It’s finally the last day of June. This is somewhat panic-inducing and relief-inducing at the same time. June was simply dismal for both my businesses, and I’m not entirely sure why. Last weekend at the market should have been great – my friend Nancy had her best Saturday this year. She was on fire, and I had a LOUSY day. Sunday wasn’t any better for me. I’ll be upgrading my display in the next couple of weeks (hopefully no more than two weekends will go by) and we’ll see how that goes.
But business wasn’t stunning. I really need to find some sort of work for steady pay and I just don’t want to. Reading the job listings for office work (what I’m really qualified to do) makes my stomach turn. I had such a bad experience at my last job, it’s like it’s permanently scarred me or something. But I need to find something – I’m considering taking any kind of unskilled work that I could get, just for the paycheck. If anyone needs a housekeeper, for example… Or retail… I do actually have retail experience from a few years ago. I sold shoes for Payless ShoeSource for about a years worth of experience. It was a little hard on my body – we did a lot of lifting over our heads, which was hard on my high-school-swim-team-injured shoulders. But that was my biggest complaint, and there are definitely retail opportunities that don’t involve lifting over my head.
Anyway, this awful month will be over in a few hours and I can set about to making July a better month for me. I hope so anyway. At least my creative funk seems to be over. I have STUFF to look forward to – the new Sudsy being the most pressing.
My name is Claire and I am pathetic.
I listed some stuff on eBay, that haven for thrift-shoppers, free-spending wheeler-dealers, and nutty people like me. I love eBay.
It’s been a while since I’ve sold anything on eBay though, so today I discovered the free counters they provide. I’m pathetic because I keep hitting reload on my counter page and thinking “Ooooooh!!! Someone else viewed my listing!!!” What’s even more pathetic is that I’ve been looking around the room thinking “What else can I sell on eBay?” and glancing speculatively at my belongings. Sadly, most things I own probably wouldn’t actually sell – the things I’m prepared to give up are more in line with being donated to a thrift store.
I think it’s time I walked away from the computer for a while. I’m getting obsessed here.
Today, I learned a new skill – cutting glass. My friend Nancy (of MacLaren Glass) gets swamped in the summer – it’s tourist season at the market, so she could use some extra help. I could use the money, so voila! I learned how to cut glass today. I managed with only one wound – a teeny shard under a fingernail. Yeouch!!! No blood, but the pain! It sheds new light on shoving things under fingernails as a torture method.
Sometime later this week I’ll be moving out of Sudsy, and into a larger space that I’ll be sharing with Nancy. I think it’ll be cool (it’s in the same building) but I’m also sad to leave Sudsy behind. It’s been such a haven for me, my own little space.
That’s all the news that’s fit to print. I think we’ll have quiche for dinner. It sounds comforting.
DH pointed me to a great time waster: Open House, a game whereby you place furniture around a room. It is a LOT more fun than it sounds. I’m embarrassed to admit how much time I spent playing this last night. It veered into hours, I’ll just say that.
Then there’s Orisinal, a collection of the cutest games ever. I am particularly fond of the Bumblebee game, although I haven’t tried them all yet.
Wasting time can be a lot of fun.
It’s a beautiful day and I’m not at the market. I didn’t have enough soap in stock to go, and besides that, I did something to my right ankle and I’m limping.
But I still feel like a schmuck for not being there. No market means no money. I had a pamper session scheduled for this afternoon, but she cancelled and rescheduled for late July. Real helpful, there.
I don’t know what I’m doing. My creative energy has been zapped away, replaced by insecurity, apathy, and fear. I’m stuck in a rut, feeling tired.
I’m not really depressed though. At this moment, I’m watching my fat cat play with a twist-tie and it’s cracking me up to watch her. She tosses it in the air, catches it in her mouth, twirls around the room with it. It’s cute. The other cat is perched on our ironing board, watching the fat one play, slowly slinking her way off the ironing board for an overhead ambush. What a pair, these two. Just watching them makes me smile.
DH is in the shower, the scent of Jafra shampoo wafting out. It’s good stuff, that Jafra shampoo. In fact, I haven’t found a Jafra product I didn’t like, and that’s not just because I sell the stuff. I feel comfortable in my decision to join the company, to become a consultant. It’s just slow going, which is frustrating me. Now that I’ve promoted to manager, I have sales goals to meet and it’s slow going there too.
Saturday mornings without market mean snuggles in bed before getting up. They mean DH makes the coffee and brings it to me, a gesture filled with thoughtfulness and love. These mornings mean a relaxed shower, not hurried, enjoying the scent of my soap and my favorite conditioner. The cool air comes in the windows, as the fat cat now sits on the sill, wishing she could eat the birds chirping outside. Maybe I just need a day of rest, to get back on my feet (literally in this case, since the injured ankle needs to heal). I need to feel restored, renewed, get back some enthusiasm and creativity.
Is it really the middle of June already? Where do the days go? I’ll enjoy this one, at least.